Hermes breeding its own crocodiles

This report from Vogue has inspired a new tag: Not The Onion.

The recession seemed like a far-removed concept for Hermes this morning, as the luxury retailer announced it is breeding its own crocodiles to keep up with the demand for its iconic handbags.

(via @bldgblog)

Sea kittens!

Somehow not from The Onion: PETA is trying rebrand fish as "sea kittens".

We're going to start by retiring the old name for good. When your name can also be used as a verb that means driving a hook through your head, it's time for a serious image makeover. And who could possibly want to put a hook through a sea kitten?

I guess that's not any worse than Chicken of the Sea. (via design observer)

Astrology is valid science?

Not from The Onion: US biochemistry professor admits that astrology would be considered valid science according to his own personal definition. Said a spectator of Pennsylvania ID trial: "I can't believe he teaches a college biology class".

Aeron wheelchair

Aeron wheelchair. Somehow not an article from The Onion.

Could you turn off that camera? The noise is disturbing our illegal drug use.

I can't believe this is from Reuters and not The Onion. Canadian Hookers Campaign Against Hollywood details an effort by The Vancouver Area Network of Drug Users organization to procure compensation for prostitutes and drug dealers displaced by movie shoots:

Sex trade workers must be compensated for displacement they experience at your hands in the same manner you would compensate a business if you were to use their locale during operating hours. The same must hold true for homeless people you push from beneath a bridge or doorway, and drug users you move from a park.

WTF?

Pornographer probed

Headline that isn't from The Onion but probably should be: Net Pornographer Probed.