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Yes, I’m posting Beyonce fanfic

posted by Jason Kottke   Apr 26, 2016

Beyonce Lemonade

This is the best thing I’ve read about Beyonce’s recently released album/film Lemonade.

*Beyoncé opens the door and Solange Knowles and Tina Lawson walk in.

Solange throws a reverse roundhouse kick that Jay Z lazily dodges.*

Solo: I’m sorry. I’m just very inspired right now.

Bey: Mommy! Solo! What a pleasant surprise! Neither of you could have had better timing

Jay: Sister-in-law. Mama Tina.

Mama T: Stereotypical Black Man

Solo: Blubberlips McSlutdick

Blue: LMAO

Bey: Baby, take your elevator to your playroom. Mommy will FaceTime you on your IPhone 8 when dinners ready.

Blue: Yes, mommy dearest

Solo: Rihanna called me to congratulate you.

Bey: She couldn’t call me?

Solo: Because you were gonna answer?

Bey: hahahahahahahahahaha

Solo: hahahahahahahahahaha

Mama T: lol omg

Bey: You may laugh

Jay: eh heh heh

Mama T: You are pathetic. The universe wasted good water creating you.

Bey: Mama. *high fives*

See also What to read after watching Beyoncé’s ‘Lemonade’.