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Language X is essentially language Y under conditions Z

A large collection of expressions compiled by John Cowan in which languages are explained in terms of other languages. Like so:

English is essentially a half dozen other languages locked in a small room. They fight.

Icelandic is essentially Norwegian spoken with an American accent.

English is what you get from Normans trying to pick up Saxon girls.

Spanish is what happened when Moors tried to learn Latin and said “screw it.”

Dutch is English spelt funny and spoken in a Klingon accent.

English is essentially French converted to 7-bit ASCII.

(thx, rasmus)