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Rules for all sorts of things

posted by Jason Kottke   Feb 19, 2009

Tom took these rules for a gunfight and adapted some of them to other contexts.

Eating Contest:
8. If you are not chewing, you should be swallowing, communicating, and running. Yell “Fire!” Why “Fire”? Cops will come with the Fire Department, sirens often scare off the sea gulls, or at least cause then to lose concentration and will…. and who is going to summon help if you yell “Hot Dog,” “Ketchup” or “Worchestire?”

Bodyguard Carrying Contest:
16. Don’t drop your guard.

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