For big kids only: the

For big kids only: the just-launched almost.org, tales of near-sex experiences.

Well, I’m off to SXSW

Well, I’m off to SXSW this evening…I’ll be back on Wednesday, late. If you’re heading there as well, make sure you locate me and say “hey”. There are a couple of easy ways to find me:

- I am doing a mentoring session on Sunday, March 12 from 11am-12:30pm. Basically, you can sign up to chat with me for 10 minutes. Why anyone would want to do that, I don’t know. But if you feel like talking, sign up.

- I am speaking on two panels on Tuesday, March 14: the Weblog Roundtable from 11:00am-12:30pm and Cease and Desist from 3:30-5:30pm. You don’t have to listen to me prattle on about nothing, but stop by near the end to say hi.

One more thing: Greg Knauss will be taking over posting to kottke.org until I return. Greg has written for all sorts of places, including Suck, teevee.org, and Worth Magazine. I hope you’ll find him as entertaining and enlightening as I do. I’m sure he won’t pass up the opportunity to do something goofy here while I’m showing my site to folks at the Weblog panel on Tuesday.

If you like to windowshop

If you like to windowshop at Amazon (as I do), but don’t want to buy anything from them due to their recent crappiness, you can use this handy bookmarklet from Peter Dapkus. Basically, it takes you from a page on Amazon and whisks you to the equivalent page on Fatbrain’s site. (thanks, Molly)

RFC 1925: The Twelve Networking

RFC 1925: The Twelve Networking Truths. (thanks, Steve)

I know it’s not fair

I know it’s not fair to toy with automated systems, but I couldn’t resist searching for strange words at thesaurus.com and then looking at how the Amazon banner (on the right) tells me to shop. Hee hee. (Even better are these searches from Dictionary.com)

We got outsmarted by a

We got outsmarted by a clown at a Perkins in New Brighton. It was a strange night all the way around.

A note for those of

A note for those of you attending SXSW: Bryan and I were talking a while back and we figured that instead of saying “South by Southwest”, which is a mouthful, it would be easier to sound out the acronym and pronounce it as “sick-sow” (you know, like an ailing pig). Go ahead, try it on, see if it suits you. I’m not entirely sold on it yet…it still sounds a little strange and pretentious when I say it.

Mark Frauenfelder brings us Boing

Mark Frauenfelder brings us Boing Boing: A Directory of Wonderful Things, a Blogger joint. Mark is responsible for, among other things, Boing Boing magazine, The Happy Mutant Handbook, and being a co-founding editor of Wired Online. I’m looking forward to reading this one. (p.s. He also has his own mini-Yahoo of nifty links. Very….er….nifty. Ahem.)

It’s 5:30 in the morning….and

It’s 5:30 in the morning….and Jason’s cranky.

My friend Mark has turned

My friend Mark has turned me into a William Shatner fan. And when I say I’m a fan, I mean that in the most sardonic sense possible. In that spirit, the William Shatner Acting Simulator is only mildly amusing (click the right-most red box for the best soundbyte).

Ever so slowly, a redesign

Ever so slowly, a redesign of kottke.org is forming in my head. Too bad I won’t get around to implementing it for quite a while. I don’t even have any time to watch the kick-ass movie I got in the mail today. Alas.

If you need to say

If you need to say you’re the best, that’s probably not the case.

I need to be more

I need to be more careful what I wish for. I really wasn’t expecting to get any entries for the 5 Bytes Contest…it was just a little joke. However, since people did send me entries, I suppose I should declare a winner. The prize-winning entry was actually sent in by my mother…who isn’t that Web-savvy, but is apparently getting moreso by the day. Go, Mom!

Since that contest went over so well, and since Stewart thinks he can trump me with his 5 bit contest, I’ll go him one better and present the 1st Annual 5 Pixel Contest. That’s right, use any five pixels to make a pattern. Here’s an early entry:

See, you don’t need all those superfluous pixels to draw those 1s and 0s….5 will do just fine.

Meta: Busy week ahead as

Meta: Busy week ahead as I prepare for SXSW and finish up some stuff for Deepleap. If I don’t answer your email, don’t worry, I’ll get to it. I’m not ignoring you, I’m just ignoring your email. :)

I went to Manny’s Steakhouse

I went to Manny’s Steakhouse last night with some friends. The double-cut of prime rib (AKA The Mountain of Cow) that I had was about the size of my head. Oh man, was it ever good though.

Quote of the day, paraphrased

Quote of the day, paraphrased from a mailing list: “Intolerance will not be tolerated.” Excellent!

In anticipation of the 5K

In anticipation of the 5K Award competition, kottke.org presents the 5 Bytes Contest. So far, this is my favorite entry. I know it’s going to be hard to beat, but send me your entries! The grand prize is any change you can find between the cushions of your couch. Those persons who do not own couches are ineligible and may not enter. Void where prohibited.

This guy is bringing us

This guy is bringing us the next big thing in Web applications? Be afraid, be very afraid. ;) (hi, bryan!)

Finally. Did you notice the

Finally. Did you notice the little icon next to today’s date? It links to the permanent URL for this entry. Use that URL to bookmark or link to this particular entry. I’ve also done the same for the previous entries for this month. At some point, I’ll go back and do this for all the previous months’ entries as well.

Oh wow. Our best wishes

Oh wow. Our best wishes go out to Keith Brown and his wife as their 7-month-old daughter recovers from heart surgery. I choked up a little when I read this:

“when you’re seven months old and your chest hurts and you’re in a loud place with strange people poking you with sharp things every few minutes and you can’t always see mommy and daddy, it can be a scary thing.”

Children are frail, yet so strong. Go, Fiona, go!

Apps like Napster, Shoutcast, and

Apps like Napster, Shoutcast, and LAUNCHcast present some real problems for the music industry….and not just because of the piracy issues. The music industry (not to mention the movie and TV industries as well) is currently geared towards producing a high volume of less-than-mediocre product and cramming it down the throats of the public with tons and tons of advertising and marketing.

With these sites and applications, people can choose what they want to listen to, not what MTV or the “local” radio station wants them to listen to. Hopefully, the “try before you buy” nature of the online music community will result in a higher quality product delivered to consumers from the record labels….now that we can test drive music, we’re not going to buy lemons anymore.

An aspiring playwright presents Titanic(er).

An aspiring playwright presents Titanic(er).

Following the lead of a

Following the lead of a co-worker of mine, I went through the Guess the Dictator and/or Sitcom Character game as myself. The computer thought I was Jack Tripper from Three’s Company. I should have seen that coming.

Passed along without comment: WinerLog

Passed along without comment: WinerLog on EditThisPage.com. Bees! Bees in my hair! Aieeee!

The astute reader will notice

The astute reader will notice that the above article is written by the same guy who wrote yesterday’s article on Amazon URL hacking. There’s a funny story behind that, but there’s no time to tell it right now.

An article over at Wired

An article over at Wired News this morning about the 5K Award. Your humble Web publisher has a small quote. Side note: I give really crappy phone interviews.

Palm Inc. (PALM) went public

Palm Inc. (PALM) went public today, closing at 95 1/16, up 57 1/16 from its IPO price. In celebration of this event, I once again present to you Simply Porn (just the ads, ma’am).

From the fake hacks department:

From the fake hacks department: Jorn Barger is featured over at Wired News as coming up with a clever way to hack Amazon and take money out of Jeff Bezos’ pocket. That’s great, except that:

- It’s not a hack. Or even close. It’s just the way the Amazon Associates program works. Since when is hacking entering a URL into your browser’s location window? Come on, Jorn….

- Any purchase from Amazon is good for them, one way or another. You want to take money out of Bezos’ pocket? Don’t buy from Amazon.

These two points lead me to believe that the writer of the article didn’t really do any research for it….research that took me all of 30 seconds to do…and I’m not even close to being a journalist. Jesus Christ on a bike.

Stolen! These knobs pilfered Lance’s

Stolen! These knobs pilfered Lance’s glassdog.net design and are unapologetic about it. (Update: the offending party appears to be taking it down…or something)

More Web theft! Dave’s worked hard over the years on a design for Scripting News, and now all these folks (here, here, here, here, here, here, and here, among others…) have gone and stolen it from him. Frankly, I’m appalled.

Well, it looks as though

Well, it looks as though the outcry against DoubleClick’s plans to electronically stalk people around the Web is paying off. Kosmo and Altavista are scaling back their involvement with DoubleClick. In particular, Altavista accounts for 20% of DoubleClick’s revenues. Perhaps the same thing will work with Amazon, the USPTO, and this whole patent mess.

Webcam picture of the day

Webcam picture of the day - The Headless Designer:

Uploading was supposed to be

Uploading was supposed to be something really cool. Now it’s “coming maybe”, or perhaps never….sorta like the rest of the Web.

Deepleap has their own commercial.

Deepleap has their own commercial. What’s not to like about a fat man dressed in red jumping in a pool? (Note to self: try the alpha when you get home tonight. Stop slacking, dammit!)

Evolution of the Photoshop toolbar.

Evolution of the Photoshop toolbar.