Someone at Yahoo Answers posted the first page of Infinite Jest with the title “First page of my book. what do you think?” The crowd was not impressed:
No discernible voice/tone in this writing. Rambling descriptions. I, frankly, do not care where each and every person is seated. I don’t care what shoe you’re wearing. If you take out all the unnecessary details, you’d be left with about seven words.
See also what happens when a photo by Henri Cartier-Bresson gets critiqued on Flickr.
to better show a sense of movement SOMETHING has to be in sharp focus