Advertise here with Carbon Ads

This site is made possible by member support. ❤️

Big thanks to Arcustech for hosting the site and offering amazing tech support.

When you buy through links on kottke.org, I may earn an affiliate commission. Thanks for supporting the site!

kottke.org. home of fine hypertext products since 1998.

🍔  💀  📸  😭  🕳️  🤠  🎬  🥔

Diary Comics: Nov. 2, 3, & 4

Some more day-in-the-life comics, with some coloring assists from my daughter.
nov-3-ez2.jpg
nov-4-ez.jpg

Discussion  8 comments

Logan Sholar

Hi, unsolicited advice warning, beware! I’m a dude so hopefully this isn’t correctile dysfunction (mansplaining). The bed time struggle is something I really relate to. My first kid I did my best to enjoy that time, but I was always resentful since I felt like that was my time. I started going down the same road with the second kid, but then discovered something. I started doing things for myself while I was still next to her in the bed in her room. While she lays there I will do work on my computer, I will read on my phone, I will do an exercise routine (pushups/planks). Things that allow me to respond to her, but give me back some me time. I’m no longer resentful (for the most part). Maybe you already do this and your mileage will most definitely vary. Regardless, I feel the frustration in that struggle. You’re not alone there. Anyway, you’re doing great blogging so far, thanks for standing in for Jason!

Edith ZimmermanMOD

No, this is great, thank you. And that is a wonderful idea. Maybe eventually I can bring a book in or something. (My problem is I read everything on my phone nowadays, and the phone is really the tantalizing object... This actually spins off onto a bigger issue I have, which is that while I am not uncomfortable with the stuff I do on my phone, or the time I spend on it, no one else -- i.e. my daughter! -- can see what it is I'm doing, and so it all just looks like "phone time." Like I want to signal that I'm reading a book or the newspaper, but for all she knows I'm just privately watching "Itsy Bitsy Spider" and not sharing!) So yeah, maybe time to bring back those physical books.

Colter Mccorkindale

If it helps, what my wife and I did was just be in the room, maybe not even visible, but audible so we could say "you're OK, I'm still here." I think I was probably also reading my phone or Kindle, which doesn't emit much light.

Reply in this thread

Katrin

"I don't feel great about it but I guess it's fine for now" - that's so much of parenting! Thank you for your relatable and somehow calming comics. And yes, where are the gold stars for us as parents? There was one time where I was holding my screaming baby son and a woman said to me "you're doing really well". I never forgot that, maybe also because it's so rare to get that kind of feedback

Edith ZimmermanMOD

I love that. Thank you, Katrin. And: bless that woman.

Reply in this thread

Neil

It was tough when I had my first child because everything was new. I had no idea what was considered "normal" and what I should pay attention to. It constantly felt like I was making decisions that would mess my kid up for life.

What I learned is that nature makes kids extra-resilient for that exact reason: parents make mistakes. (They also make them look like us so we won't eat them, but that's another story.) We feed them less-than-optimal food, allow them to watch questionable videos, and run away from them (briefly) because we're on the edge.

I don't know your parenting style, but the fact that you're questioning yourself is proof enough that you're on the right path. That you care enough to feel unsure shows that you love your child and have their best interests in mind. Everything else will work itself out. Even sleep! As the parent of a child who didn't start sleeping regularly until they were two, trust me on this one.

Edith ZimmermanMOD

Thank you, Neil.

Reply in this thread

Colter Mccorkindale

"I'm sure my life is unattractive. I don't do anything & I'm always mad."

Oof. Yep. That's as effective a description as I've found for parenting in the early years. This tapered off for us around age 6/7, when our girls started becoming more human and communicative. But finding things to do with our hands has helped. My wife knits and I play guitar.

Hello! In order to leave a comment, you need to be a current kottke.org member. If you'd like to sign up for a membership to support the site and join the conversation, you can explore your options here.

Existing members can sign in here. If you're a former member, you can renew your membership.

Note: If you are a member and tried to log in, it didn't work, and now you're stuck in a neverending login loop of death, try disabling any ad blockers or extensions that you have installed on your browser...sometimes they can interfere with the Memberful links. Still having trouble? Email me!