Paul Ford has plans to make a

Paul Ford has plans to make a better TV show than The Wire, “set in even worse parts of Baltimore”.

I’ll use cave paintings as the model for my series. Omar will chase mammoths through the streets and Carcetti will wear a robe made from a wolf and Beadie will chew bear meat for her children before passing it from her mouth. And everyone will speak proto-Indoeuropean without subtitles and the hidden cultural theme that no one sees will be land-bridge migration and phenotype variation.

I have already pre-ordered seasons 1 through 261,492.

• Paul Ford
• The Wire