I don’t know the origin of my affinity toward “best/worst of”-type lists, but I sure do love ‘em. John Scalzi is running a series of “Best of the Millennium” articles for the months of November and December. Topics include Best Lopsided War (Spanish-American), Best Crackpot Religious Leader (Rasputin), and Best 15 Minutes of Fame (TBD). I hereby nominate the pencil as the Best Thing to Put in Your Mouth When You Don’t Have Gum or A Cigarette. Most men might disagree with that, but I digress.