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The Ride is dead

posted by Jason Kottke   Sep 04, 1998

Ladies and gentlemen, The Ride™ is dead. Let’s all observe a moment of silence.

 
What is The Ride, you ask? The Ride was my 1981 Pontiac Bonneville…quite possibly the longest car ever to roll off of the production line. It was huge and a huge crowd favorite. Kids and adults alike came from miles around just to take a ride in it. It brought people together. It loved us all.

But The Ride got too unreliable. Finicky fuel pump. 1 quart of oil every 100 miles. Inoperative gas gauge. One missing “bright” headlamp. No dome light. Missing rearview mirrow. Flat spare tire. Idled too fast. Wouldn’t run right in traffic or when it was hot. “Check engine” light on all the time. Clock didn’t work and displayed 12:00 when the blinker was on. Clock also displayed 12:00 when the bass was loud on the radio. Leaked power steering fluid. Radio tuner knob inoperable. Broken air conditioning. Among other things.

So it was time to get something else. My “new” car is a 1990 Nissan Sentra, formerly (and solely) owned by a minister. It’s not spectacular, but it works well and it’s mine.

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