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Watching the game and drinking ‘til she’s pretty

If you’re waiting for people to stop assuming that sports fans are a bunch of beer-swilling chuckleheads, you’ll need to wait a little longer. Of the first six paragraphs of a story about Minnesota Twins outfielder Torii Hunter’s recent miscues by ESPN “senior writer” Jim Caple, here are three:

“See? This is where Bob makes his crucial mistake. When he orders the eighth beer. If he cuts himself off at seven, he probably doesn’t even talk to that woman, let alone go home with her.”

“Hank, if you had to do it all over again, would you still say those pants make your wife look fat?”

“That @#&% Johnson. I would have gotten that promotion if he hadn’t accidentally sent those bachelor party photos on an officewide e-mail. What a moron.”

Ah, the social tribulations of the red-blooded American male. He told his wife that her pants made her look fat even though she said it was ok to say so and he actually fell for it! OMG! I think read about that in a joke book in the 80s.