Justin Bieber is a man  AARON COHEN  ·  MAY 17 2012

Justin Bieber recently had his 18th birthday so GQ sent Drew Magary to make him a man. It didn't quite go as planned, but here are the 8 best parts of the story.

Harrell is an incredibly nice man who looks like a black version of Johnny Depp's Willy Wonka, so I was happy to sit around and stare at his hair for a while.

If someone asks you if you'd like to punch Justin Bieber in the face, the answer is yes.

His voice is so high, it sounds like a ringtone.

No one can be normal living under the circumstances that constitute daily life for Justin Bieber.

We talk music, and he mentions his love for pre-"Black Album" Metallica--"One," "Fade to Black." "Those are my jams," he says.

"I'm 18 years old and I'm a swaggy adult!" he yells. "Come on, swaggy bros!"

His flow is slower than prostate cancer.

And he surely knows what it's like to be hated by people who've never met you. Unlike Kardashian, though, Bieber is legitimately talented.

The new Vanilla Ice hairdo is puzzling...why would Bieber want to go anywhere near that one-hit wonder flame out mess?

Read more posts on kottke.org about:
Drew Magary   Justin Bieber

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